Afraid of the Dark

Michelle Devlin

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Book Description

Why would a woman who appears to have the perfect life initiate a devastating plummet that may quickly destroy that life? In the face of losing everything, why does she continue abusing alcohol and drugs; and cutting her arms, legs, and breasts with razor blades?

Afraid of the Dark is a riveting account of a woman on the edge. Ali Connery’s attempts to escape her emotional turmoil provide an unflinching look at the harrowing effects of childhood sexual abuse. Memories of sexual demands, dirty whispers, and rough hands set Ali on a path of self-destruction. When her alcohol and drug induced fumbling fails to distract her from her self-loathing and shame, she turns to self-injury. She is compelled to cut herself again and again, allowing her pain to bleed from her body.

Afraid of the Dark is a troubling and frightening account of a life gone sadly wrong — a story that will continue to haunt long after the last sentence is read.

From the Author

I was pleased to come across your site. I am 49 and a “cutter.” I’m the victim of chilhhod sexual abuse and abused alcohol and drugs before turning to SI. I started cutting when I was about 44 years old. When I began cutting I had never heard of self-injury. I was simply trying to find a way to expend my self-loathing. Currently, I see a psychologist every week and I’m making progress on being clean & sober, and cut-free.

I’ve also written a novel — Afraid of the Dark — about a young woman in similar cicumstances. It’s not an autobiography, but I drew on personal experiences while writing. I live in the U.S. and had a book signing at Barnes & Noble (Sugar Land, TX; suburb of Houston) in December, 2002, and had the opportunity to talk to some of the teen-agers afterward. I was surprised and thrilled when they confided in me, telling me about their own struggles and challenges. I have also spoken at a non-profit organization in Houston on the long-term effects of sexual abuse and I’m scheduled to speak — on self-injury — at Devereaux Texas Treatment Center. (League City, TX branch; suburb of Houston) in August. My name has also been submitted to speak at other organizations about the rising problem of SI. And, I recently discovered that my book was on the list of “recommended books” handout given to the attendees of a sexual abuse conference. I’m on a mission to raise public awareness about SI and I’m trying to give some insight as to how a person could reach such a point of desperation in their life, that they felt SI was the next logical step.

Thank you once again for the fantastic site. Warm regards, Michelle Devlin

Afraid of the Dark


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