Well, my name is Abby and I am thirteen years old. I started self-mutilating when I was twelve. When I was a child my parents would beat me until I was crying so loud that they couldn’t take it any longer. They would drag me and my sisters by our hair downstairs into our bedroom. Throwing things. When my dad got mad enough he would throw our belongings out the door and put them on the street. Until my mom came home and she would calm him down. My parents never noticed us when we were younger. I have known that my parents got high since I was to young to remember. But it’s always been a secret. My parents stopped beating us when we were seven or eight. Then one night when I went to my cousins house. She showed me that she had cut herself. A month later I started cutting myself. That was when I was twelve. About six months after I started cutting, I started feeling suicidal. I wanted anything to die. I always faught with my parents. So being around my house was stressful. I went to a mental institution for a suicide attempt. Soon after that I was still cutting myself. I started burning myself. Two months passed and things were going OK. Once they got hectic again I swallowed a handful of pills. I told my counsellor the next day. And she put me back in the mental institution. The second time I went there my parents were going to divorce. But they didn’t. Now I’m thirteen. And still cutting myself, burning myself, taking pills, and still suicidal. I punch mirrors, or walls to let out anger. Well one night in June, I got mad, brought a friend home and told my parents she was spending the night. I fought with them about it. Soon my mom said you need to be in the mental institution, I ran. I ran to my friend’s house. Forty-five minutes later the cops showed up. They escorted me home. I punched a mirror and turned my music up as loud as it could go. And this was at midnight. My parents called the cops on me again. I was arrested. And charged with disorderly conduct. The next thing is juvy. I would do anything to leave this house. But I can’t. I’m bisexual, and still havent come out to my parents. I think they would disown me if they knew. I will admit I get high sometimes. And I drink. I don’t know how else to help myself. Cutting doesn’t always help. I don’t know what’s going to happen next, my parents could be getting a divorce. And my mother admitted herself into the mental institution today. They blame me for it. Telling me I drove her insane. This is the story of my life. I don’t know what to do next.
Well — my story… okay…
I have had problems with eating disorders for three and a half years now.
Before I already hated me, my entire life. 4 years ago I injured myself for the first time, but my mother noticed it and I promised her to stop. So I stopped for 2 and a half years, then I started again.
First it just was the right arm, but when I went to hospital, my left arm was cut, too.
Now I am cutting every day. I dont’t want to be alive anymore. But I’m still in Therapy.
I think your pictures are a little dangerous.