Psyke.org

Pandora

24/01/2004

Copyright, Pandora

My heart is empty
Pain is silk
Bullet hole through my chest
Took the feelings away
A ring broken, symbol of hope, gone
Turned into a slashing blade
Cuts deep into my soul
I cut deep…
again and again and again…
the rage
Why can’t I feel?

never again…
no, never again…
it can’t cut, no longer

Each time faster, deeper
Each time closer to numbness
Anaesthesiatic treatment
Each time aches less
Feels less
Tears stop falling
Can’t believe it works…
Just one more time
Won’t do it again…
I’m fine, and you?
Everyone is fine…

never again…
no, never again…
I can’t cut, no longer…

Nobody sees, nobody knows…
Adiction.
Pain is never good… right?
I’m falling into myself
Falling over my arm
burning, aching
I need this…

No!
Never again…
No, never again…
I can’t… It can’t cut… No Longer.

Crying

Copyright, Pandora

I’m better now
Been so hurt I hurt myself
But I’m good now
I cut the cuts, stop the pain
Feel much better now
That I’m taking it all off my mind
So much better now
Still feel the numbness inside

But I’m crying
Tears don’t fall
I don’t crawl
But I’m crying
Deep within
I feel the pain
I am crying…

I think I’m better now
Supress the feelings, end the ache
Feel so good now
Just can’t cry, don’t know why
I’m much better now
Not depressed, I smile again
I’m getting worse now!…
My heart explodes, I can’t hold it!…

But I’m crying
Tears don’t fall
I don’t crawl
But I’m crying
Deep within
I feel the pain
I am…

I’m falling apart!
Can’t fool myself!
Everyone believes…
I’m fine…
Don’t cut no more!
Don’t cry, don’t tremble…
But I’m the same still…
Still dying inside.

But I’m crying
Tears don’t fall
I don’t crawl
But I’m crying
Deep within
I feel the pain
I am crying

All because of you.
You.
It’s all your fault.
You.

I can’t believe I’m laughing…

Untitled

Copyright, Pandora

Went downstairs for a glass of water
Found a sharp knife inside a drawer
(water, drawer, water…)

Went upstairs to my nest
Found my sweet, sweet rest
(nest, rest, nest…)

Thought I was better, I had awoken
Found my snake ring lying broken
(awoken, broken awoken…)

My feelings became but a cloud
The cry inside was too loud
(cloud, loud, cloud…)

Search for myself in the mist
All I found was my wrist
(mist, wrist, mist…)

Cut the ring into the flesh
Never thought it could slash
(flesh, slash, flesh…)

Now I wait for it to heal
The ring hidden in my heel
(heal, heel, heal…)

Pain inside is quiet now
It’s gonna die down there, somehow
(now, somehow, now…)

water drawer
nest rest
awoken broken
cloud loud
mist wrist
flesh slash
heal heel
now somehow

Tired

Copyright, Pandora

I’m tired of hiding my arm
Come, come, see the wounds
They will fade away soon

Look closer if you will
I’m tired of hiding what
I truly feel

Just because you see these
Doesn’t mean you see the pain
Just because you see me
Doesn’t mean you see my soul
Why don’t you look closer
And see me within
See the angel fallen from grace
See the deep hiden sin

Marcas

Copyright, Pandora

Estas marcas sairão, hão-de sair um dia
A sua beleza vai-se esvair, perderei a sua companhia
Elas sabem como me sinto, sabem a minha dor
Elas sabem a mágoa, a tragicidade do amor

Cobrem o meu braço, escondo-as sem razão
Testemunhas do sofrimento, filho da solidão
Gritam o meu choro mudo, contam os meus segredos
Divulgam o meu ser, divulgam os meus medos

Estas marcas sairão, hão-de sair um dia
Mas cravarão na minha mente a sua memória toda a vida
Tão belas escondidas sob a manga e a luva
Tão belas expostas, molhadas na chuva

Scars

Copyright, Pandora

This is a translation of the poem above.

These scars will go, they will go one day
Their beauty will fade away, I will loose their company
They know how I feel, they know my pain
They know the sorrow, the tagedy of love

They cover my arm, I hide them for no reason
Witnesses of the suffering, son of the loneliness
They shout my silent weep, they tell my secrets
They let out me, they let out my fears

These scars will go, they will go one day
But forever will they carve their memory in my mind
So beautiful hiden under the sleeve and the gloove
So beautiful exposed, wet in the rain

 

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