To die may be the only way to forget
Copyright, Little Man
I was reading the story from Crow, and can totally relate. My earliest memories include being molested by the babysitter when I was 4 or watching my dad brutally knocking out my sister’s front teeth over 2 dollars and some change. From there it’s only gotten worse: Physical, mental, emotional and sexual abuse. Now I’m an adult and no longer drink all this shit keeps coming back. I see images in my head so real it’s like it happened yesterday. The only way I can make it go away is to crawl back into a bottle which only fogs over the shit or to give up my wife and kids and put a bullet in my skull. I’ve tried many times as a drunk to take my life but I think it’s some thing you got to be sober for or you just end up with another scar. I thought if I had children and gave them a good life it would help me cope with the atrocities I lived through as a child but in reality it just makes it harder to put an end to it. If any one out there has a good way to cope without the use of my 30/30 I’d love to hear it, before I do something to wreck my childrens heads and put them where I’m at.