Copyright, Kiddo

lost control
gained control
lost a love
gained a love
lost a friend
gained a friend
but with time,
that too will be
being able to keep myself
from reaching the breaking point.
ive lost
i believed in true love
believe in myself
ive lost
shiny razors
bloody letters.
they spell
the word.
lies after lies
ive lost the war.
myself and i
we no longer have
we no longer have
a reason.
we no longer have
WE are no longer.

Blood Red Lies

Copyright, Kiddo

living lies
living tales
left behind.
a best friend.
a sister.
my only reason left.
a guy
a friend
a neighbor
a former love.
asking of permission.
to break my heart.
to reveal his deep seeded lies.
once a four letter word to describe passion.
thats what i felt for you.
now a four letter word to describe great disliking.
my present feelings of you.
i hate everything about him.
but still
cut after cut
tear after tear
fake smile
after fake smile.
i cant bring myself to stop loving.
these BLOOD red lies
boil to the surface.
scaring my body.
taking my pride.
burying my soul.
BLOOD red lies.
is all i have left of you.
you have my permission to break my heart.
you have my permission to steal my pride.
but you dont have my permission to a second chance.
ive been hurt too many times
unwillingly… i let you go.
unwillingly… i let go.
let go.
let go.

Masterpiece Escape

Copyright, Kiddo

the yelling, the fighting
the darkness beneath.
it itches and curses
it wants to be released.
as i frantically search
for a way to escape
i spot a razor, shimmering.

a silver, shinning key to freedom.
i put it to my skin, a flesh canvas.
as it glides slowly a masterpiece forms
a blood red reminder that im not ok.

i could get help, but thats too easy.
im not sick im just a little queezy.
fearful. unsure. scared. depressed.
my cries for help can only be answered by one.
a friend, a pal, my own personal diary made of flesh and bone.
that and the image of my prince charming. my knight and shining armor.

my cries for help are seldom heard.
my masterpiece escape grows with each word.
each reason why it didnt work out.
slowly, but surely, i sink into my dark, bloody abyss.
one day, maybe, ill be able to escape.


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