Psyke.org

Ozz Frey

My Addictions

Copyright, Ozz Frey

My name is Ozz Frey. I am a 17 year old female from South Jersey. I have been coping with my self-mutilation for 6 years now. I grew up in an abusive household in upstate NY. My father was a fall down drunk crack head, who when he had nothing better to do, would beat my mother and I. When I was 9 my mother decided to leave him. I went with her. But when her boyfriend committed suicide in our garage I moved back with him. He would beat me on a regular basis, for the pettiest things. Like, if I didn’t wash a dish right. God forbid I get in trouble at school. When I was in 7th grade I discovered the wonders of self-mutilation. I loved it. Every day I would carve a new notch in my arm. It felt so good I couldn’t stop, rather, didn’t want to. This lasted all through middle school, all the way up to last week. I have been hospitalized 3 times, put on 4 types of anti-depressants and anti-psychotics. But nothing seems to work for me. I love cutting myself, and I really don’t want to stop. Right now I am on Prozac, and it’s not helping me at all. The urge, and yearn is still there, and I have ample time and opportunity to do this stuff. I don’t want to stop, but I have to, I know I do, because it’s not healthy, and it’s tearing my family asunder. I need advice, for my addiction. Please help me.

 

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