Copyright, Chelle

I first started when I was 13. I am now 16. I didn’t cut. I burnt myself, I did it with a metal clip off a pencap. Then I went to cutting just about a year ago. I wouldn’t do it that bad… one little cut not even longer than an inch. Then I started doing longer ones and more of them and that was only on my wrist. And just about a few weeks ago I started doing them on my thighs on both legs and up as high as to my hip. I also started doing designs on my ankles, little star things (*), those LOL or X’s, whatever suited my fancy. I’d cut really deep on my thighs because no one could see them when I wore shorts, since I wear boy shorts. I could be a manic depressive but I am not sure because I lie to my doctor when I get my prozac which doesn’t help. I have a son. I could also have post partum depression. Not sure though because I had him 5 months ago. I’ve been depressed practically all my life. Recently I know why. Because of drugs and family members’ love. Friends, I don’t have many of those. I am used in relationships so instead of going to someone for comfort I’d go to my blade. I’m not suicidal. Cutting just feels better. I don’t do it for attention I hide them. I’m not really ashamed though either. But I still hide them. I’ve tried to stop for myself, my son and my girlfriend but it’s hard, oh so hard and I am not quite sure on what to do.


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