Copyright Ayla

My name is Ayla. I’m now fifteen, going to be sixteen in April. I have been cutting for about one and a half to about two years. It first started out as just some harmless scratches then I started carving my initials into my hip and I’d cut my leg because no one would see it there. Then I started on my arms. I was SI’ing about every day. I felt like I didn’t belong and if I didn’t I was lost that day. I have cut back now but when I get really mad or a really powerful emotion that I want to change into happiness or being satisfied I turn to cutting. It’s a horrible thing to do. I was clean from SI for about a month up till yesterday. I only stopped because of one person; ABS (initals, I don’t know if he wants his name on here) but he was my love at the time and he found out. He told me he’d help no matter what then we went our seperate ways. So I stared to cut more and more. I’m hoping one day I can look at any thing and not think is that sharp enough to cut me. Of course ABS is still in my life today and he keeps me from wanting to do it. I love him very much. And thank him for helping me and being the one person I can tell anything.


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