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BloodRose

Crimson Kiss

Copyright, BloodRose

The Crimson Kiss upon my flesh
The crimson kiss that sears my soul
A droplet of blood
The razor brings
And once again, I am whole.

Crimson kisses
Razored bliss
I’m only human
Enough
To bleed to death.

Silky red
On pale white
Flesh
Bleeding, hurting,
Relieving stress.

The Crimson kiss
The razor brings
Doth don my flesh
My soul
Doth sing.

The pain is flooding
Away from thy
Yet pain is coming
By day
And Nye.

The razor brings
The Crimson kiss
The razor chortles
Joy
And bliss.

Awaiting thee
The crimson kiss
Of immortal
Pain and
Beautiful bliss.

It doesn’t stop
This beautiful pain
This crimson kiss
Is one
To maim.

It sears the soul
And scars the flesh
This Crimson kiss of
Razored bliss

Invisible Tears

Copyright, BloodRose

I cry silently so no one hears
I’m afraid of them, Will they hurt me?
I can’t be seen, I’m invisible to them
I like being invisible.. It’s harder to hurt someone when they’re invisible.

I like that.
They can’t see the scars, the tears, the scratches
I don’t like them, They make me hurt.
Make them go away.

My invisibility wore off.
They’re laughing at me like i’m a freak.
I guess I am.
I hate them, I want to be invisible again

They laugh and chatter and talk about me
I can hear them perfectly well
I start to cry again and I pull out my knife.
They see it and scream

I’m not going to attack them
I attack myself
Slicing into my skin
Making a new pain to focus on

There’s no such thing as a “Life devoid of Pain”
Pain in iminent. Even when you’re invisible.
I want to be invisible again.
Maybe if I bleed enough, I will become invisible.

You become paler when you bleed.
Maybe if I bleed, they won’t be able to see me.
I cut deeper, wishing to be invisible.
Suddenly I am. I am dead.

Beautiful Pain

Copyright, BloodRose

I wait. Wait for the longing
Inside
Of me to be subdued.

It will never be that way
Though
I will never be fulfilled.

Clean. That’s what I’ve been.
Clean.
I don’t want to stay clean.

I want the blood to run.
See
The Crimson kisses upon my skin.

The droplets of red.
Red.
The color of life.

Red. Red.
The color of Death.
The color I wish to be.

Covered in it.
Death.
Red. Color.

Slicing. Bleeding
I need to have it.
I need to feel that pain that

Sends me to another world
Different.
Different pain. Beautiful Pain

Torment

Copyright, BloodRose

I sit in the darkness humming to the sound of my music.
I rock back and forth, silently plotting their deaths.
Why can’t they let me be?
Am I really that important for them to torment me?

They cause me pain.
They must not know the hours of pain I go through because of them.
I had over 30 cuts on my wrist at one point.
The scars are still there. All because of them.

It’s not because of him,
It’s not because of the her.
It’s the whole god damn fucking world.
They’re all against me.

I’ve lost all self confidence
I think I’m better off dead.
I feel so alone.
My knife is getting duller, so it hurts more and more.

Have they ever been through it?
Some, maybe, most never.
They can’t even compare.
Their lives are perfect and I’m the quiet little girl they torment.

Can I just go mad and shoot them all at school?
No, i’d get life, or death. I don’t want that.
The depressions getting deeper. The knife is in my hand.
I can feel the blood trickling, Do they know my pain?

Do they even care.
No.
They.
Don’t.
They never will.

I’m too scared to kill myself.
Not because of the Pain,
But because of the very few people I love.
I don’t want them to suffer.

My friends are even derserting me now.
Soon I’ll be all alone.
Maybe, if I lose the ones I love,
I’ll put the gun in my own hand, and shoot.

They just don’t care.
They must hate me terribly.
They ignore me and glare
Hatred.

I hope if you read this you are deeply touched.
Know my pain. Know how I feel
If you are one I know, be glad.
You might be the one or two people keeping me from dying.

I can’t say I thank you.
I can’t say I hate you for doing it.
I don’t know what to say.
You’re keeping me from doing the one thing I really want.

I want to die
And pass into the spiritual realm, where there is no pain.
Kill me now please,
Anyway you see fit.

Take me out of my misery.
Take away this pain of being alone.
Some one kill me now.
Even if I hurt the ones I love.

They’re probably better off without me.
I’m too damn depressed.
Life sucks,
Why is the world against me?

I want my blood to drip.
Should I slit my wrist?
Or hang myself?
Or use a gun?
Or what? Ideas? please?

I want to die.
Most of you don’t understand.
I hate life, and people.
They hate me back.

What’s the big deal?
So they’re all happy
But I was made to be miserable?
Stupid people and their torment.

 

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