Psyke.org

Brianna

Unwanted

Copyright Brianna

Look at her
She s bleeding
She s hurt within her soul
She s screaming for your help, for your love.
Don t you see she s dieing?
Hurt within her life, hurt with her love, hurt beyond the pain of living
She s only to find more unwanted pain, unwanted bleeding.
She ll never be happy, she ll never be the same.
She longs for her death
But in the end she ll always have
Unwanted pain

Always Said

Copyright Brianna

Never be a quitter,
that’s what momma said.
But she was the one who quit on me,
put hatred in my head.
She never thought it would happen to me,
never thought I’d intentionally cry.
Never thought I’d slit my wrist,
never have thoughts of wanting to die.
She said to keep my head above water,
continue trying to swim.
And then one day I’ve had enough,
I did it on a whim.
I began to hurt myself,
began to blood flow.
She never thought it would happen,
but she’ll never know.
Crying nothing,
nothing but tears of lead.
Never be a quitter,
that’s what momma always said

Never Say Never

Copyright Brianna

I wake in the morning,
and take a look at my face.
But as my eyes meet the mirror,
I only see a disgrace.
As tears roll down,
bloodshot eyes.
I know it wasn’t you,
last night silencing my cries.
And, I know this is true,
I’ll never win you back.
I cheated on you,
but now my life is on track.
I want you but yet,
I don’t need you like I used to.
You don’t even know half,
of the shit I’ve been through.
Pain sears through my chest,
here it goes again.
PIcking up the razor,
there’s no more pretend.
Slicing and dicing,
deeper into my arm.
Howling in pain,
only causing more harm.
But tell me this now,
does it hurt you, too?
When I hurt myself,
just to get back at you?

Let Go

Copyright Brianna

Drown today,
Die tomorrow,
Fill my life full of sorrow
Cut once, cut twice,
each sleek which its slice
I want blood,
To see it flow,
lose my life and let it go.
I can’t hold on any more,
I have nothing left to live for.
So say goodbye and wave on,
I’m drifting off, soon to be gone.

Cut

Copyright Brianna

I wanna cut and watch me bleed,
I can feel the blood running, it’s something I need
To cut my skin and see it flow,
I lose my life and let it go.
The marks so tender and red,
makes me wish I was dead
The razor is my friend,
It will never fail, turn,or bend
It slashes my skin in such a sleek way,
For this is something I battle each day.

Why did you do that, Brianna?

Copyright Brianna

Why did you do this to me?
That’s the last chance I’ll ever take.
Maybe this pain isn’t real,
And the blood on my arm is fake.
Maybe this is just a dream,
And in a million tears,
I’ll finally wake.

I wish I could hate you,
I know I should.
I’d forget all about you
If only I could.

Those who take incredible risks
Are just asking for the pain.
You’ve made me cut,
You’ve driven me insane.
I don’t want your pity,
And I don’t like to complain.

I should have known, I knew it inside.
I wanna leave here, I wanna go hide.
That razor has cut apart our pride.

In endless cuts I release me heart.
Next time again, I’ll have to start.
Next time, that I rip my veins apart.

I don’t care, it doesn’t hurt anymore.
I know I don’t wanna cut once more.
But I can’t help it,
So shut, and lock the door.

Why did you put the razor on your vein?
Now there’s a happiness you can’t sustain.

I am forever dead, this was the day.
Yes, you killed me today,
So dead I’ll stay.

My Best Friend

Copyright Brianna

I’ve found someone,
She wants to help me.
She makes me feel good,
But at an incredible fee.
She gives me these scars
For everyone to see.

No one else wanted to help,
Only she would.
No one seemed to love me
And relieve me like she could.
Everyone says it’s bad,
But she says I should.

Sometimes I hate her.
Sometimes I love her.
Sometimes I laugh with her.
Sometimes I cry with her.
Sometimes I listen to her.
Sometimes I scream at her.

No one can understand me like she will.
She overcomes any pain, unlike some pills.

Our friendship has become very intimate.
Though sometimes I feel I am through with it.

She touches my skin,
Then rips within.
And now the bleeding shall begin.

We watch together as the blood drips out.
She smiles happily, as I hold back a shout.

I later regret our deadly games
That were just for fun.
Back then it helped,
But she always won.

But it helps me dearly,
Which is what I want.
Then I later cry,
While she greedily flaunts.

I cry and weep, then I do it again.
It’s a continuous cycle, that doesn’t seem to end.
But then again, she’s my only friend.

They tried to take her away,
But I got her back.
And then I grieve,
At all the happiness I lack.

The silence is giving me a headache.
Their ignorance is making me heart break.
The coldness is making my hope flake.
The happiness that once was now is fake.
The constant fear is making my body shake.

I’m in too deep of trouble.
My anger is almost double.
I’m stuck in this bubble.
Of constant sorrow.
Maybe it’ll all be better tomorrow.
I doubt it…

The sadness is made.
The darkness won’t fade.
I love her though,
My razor blade.

 

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