Copyright Mona

Hi, I’m Mona from Belgium. Now I’m sixteen years old and I want to tell this story because I want to help people. I was ten years old when I started to cut myself. I did this because nobody believed me. I’ve been sexually abused by the brother of my father. It was so painful that I searched for another thing to feel another pain. The first time I cut myself it was with a piece of a mirror, I cut myself in my legs. And the strange thing was, it felt really good. But it only was getting worse, because it felt good I cut myself almost every day. On my arms, my wrists, and so many other places. One time they had to bring me to the hospital because I lost so much blood. Then I was thirteen years old. That was the first time that my parents found out about my self harm. They really didn’t know that I was so messed up. They made an appointment with a psych. I call it that way because they aren’t better than us. Most of them did the same thing and then they’re gonna tell us what we must do. She said to me that I must go back to reality. That time it was the only thing in the world that could help me. If I didn’t cut myself I yelled at people and broke all of my stuff. And that’s worse than hurting myself. Two years went by and it didn’t get better. I changed school and everybody looked at me like I was a freak. I tried to kill myself three times. But the last time my father saw me, I was going to jump off a bridge. Now I’m glad that he drove by. Now two years later I’m a lot better. I stopped cutting and I have a boyfriend who helped me very much. But I have one tip for all the boys and girls that are going trough the same thing as me, listen to the song ‘Between Angels and Insects’ by Papa Roach. I was cutting when I heard this song and I was thinking ‘what the hell am I doing?’ I stopped immediately. The only thing I hate now I stopped, the scars. They’re everywhere. It hurts when I see them. It reminds me of the bad times I’ve been through. But I’m getting from my grandparents a present for my birthday: a laser surgery. I hope that helps and that they’re all gone then. But I’m gonna stop my story here. I hope I help a lot of people because I know how it feels to be a freak, and also how it feels when you’re not one.


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