Security Blanket

Copyright Jess

As i stare at my wrist
Run my fingers over it
Long bumps twist my finges around
The wierd pattern is art to some
Suicide to others
Every bump expressing a feeling
Showing an emotion
Smiling as i see the blood stains
This is my security blanket


Copyright Jess

Staining the Blade Once again
Becuase i cant take this pain
gettin the rope and tying it tight
standing on the chair
Ready to hang
Placing the rope around my neck
I wonder what life is after death
I make it tight
Kick the chair
Close my eyes
This is the end
I say good-bye


Copyright, Jess

This pain, it never leaves me
Nothing to gain,everything i cant be
i thought your love would save me
i guess i was wrong,
for you’ve stabbed me in the back
i here our song,
and all i see is black
as i sit in my room
feeling the blood flow freely
and alast tonight i free my soul
and try to climb out of this whole
but im stuck
here with your ghost
just my luck
yet i still love you the most
but i shall never look back,
and if i do
you will feel my pain too

Fatherly Figure

Copyright, Jess

Im shivering
Im shaking
My spine is full of fear

Im sad
Im breaking
I will not shed a tear

I was younge
Now Im old
Yet he stays within me

Lived in fear
Always cold
When will I be free?

He lingers here
Here with me
He has stained my life

Wish to fly
To be free
Cured with a knife

Make Me Stumble

Copyright, Jess

Watch my eyes and you will see
All my sealed emotions leak from me
Deep in my soul
Lyes a place that no one has seen
Where pieces of my heart rest
Broken by those so mean

Pop a pill, slit my wrist
Burn my skin, just like this

I hide my feelings in a place so deep
A place my tears I tend to keep
Dont tell me you love me
Cause its not true
Dont try to be my friend
Cause it wont last
Thats the trueth now and in the past
Nothing good ever lasts

Pop another pill slit my other wrist
Burn my skin again, just like this

That word called happiness
It’s just pure bliss
It only comes so often
But its usually missed

Popped to many pills, bled from the wrists
Just like this

Send me a flower if you remember
Aim for the six foot hole
And try not to miss!


Copyright, Jess

this pain in my head
isnt going away
god how i hate it
it cannot stay
running away
from all the shame
this blade in my hand
take it away
cut the flesh
do it hard
do it fast
do it now
it cannot last
i cant take it
im gonna crack
i need this blade
to stay on track
its kinda sad
just how bad
i need this blade
to keep me sane
to help the pain

Escaping the Pain

Copyright, Jess

the pain is burning
like hot coals
the cold is stinging
like sharp glass
the world is whirling
like a marry-go-round
the walls are closing
like a barbed wire cage
the screaming is ringing
like an out of control phone
the air is disappearing
like hands choking

knives cutting
razors burning
pills relieving
alcohol intoxicating
smoke calming
feeling leaving
pain leaving

it seems so simple
one more second
and it will all end

no more pain
no more cold
no more spinning world
no more walls closing
no more voices yelling
no more air evaporating

the knife will sting
but just for a second
the razor will burn
but not for too long
the pills will upset
but only for a time
then it will all be done

escaping the pain
away from hurt
the screams subsided
all worries disappear


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