Copyright, Jillian

i light the candles
fill the bath
turn off the lights
and strip away till none is left
but an open canvas and a burning need

to feel
to live
to hurt
to bleed

and i sink below the waters surface
until my eyes can barely see
the light that plays across
bathroom walls and shines off tragic steel
that only begs

to sink
to swim
to bring release
to dance with crimson

But bright against the steam
rises a ghost from the ashes
of my worldly restraints
and for a moment
my soul can stand aside
and let the river run it’s coarse

down my arm
down the drain
down to where my thoughts remain

and once the scarlet’s gone
swirling with my filthy world
i’ll sit up
dry off
get dressed
and pretend not to notice
a new picture
carved across my fragile canvas.

Dear My Sheltered World

Copyright, Jillian

Catch the moment
Blare the music
Don’t stop ‘till it hurts
Flip the switch
Turn off the lights
No one wants to see what I’ve done
Turn off your own lights
Live in your own safe walls
Of sugar cane and poppy seeds
Don’t be so na´ve
Life isn’t always so clean
It leaves marks
And scars
And this ugly truth
That no one wants to see
So turn off your OWN lights
Leave me with my bright red screams.


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